Hymen = Virgin Membrane
Hymen and Sex. Will sex spoil the hymen?
First, it is necessary to define "sex".
Let's try to define "sex" as physical stimulation of erogenous zones in order to provide the organism with sufficient amount of brain chemicals which give us a feeling of bodily pleasure.
Such a stimulation must be usually preceded and accompanied by activities triggering sexual arousal in response to stimuli which are individually recognized as attractive.
Most of these activities are voluntary, some are involuntary. Searching the internet for porn visual stimulants is definitely a voluntary activity, as much as not leaving immediately a pornographic web page entered by chance. The same is true about physical stimulation. If a horse rider experiences a wave of pleasure resulting from having her clitoris pressed against the saddle and keeps enjoying this form of stimulation, she does it by choice, voluntarily takes advantage of involuntarily discovered source of pleasure. If she did not want to have her clitoris stimulated this way, she could do it easily by changing her riding position.
Most pleasurable and sensitive areas of the body also know as erogenous zones contain high amounts of microscopic sensors reacting to touch, pressure, displacement, distortion, temperature, etc. The highest concentration occurs in the glans of the clitoris and the glans of the penis, although the clitoris is far more sensitive than the head of the penis. The vagina has few sensory receptors and does not belong to erogenous zones. In special circumstances of strong sexual arousal even a slight touch applied to less sensitive areas can cause an orgasm (the touch-less orgasms also happen) but this is exceptional and usually only rhythmic and vigorous stimulation of the glans, ends in climaxing followed by release of satisfactory amount of own brain chemicals.
The erection of the penis is easily seen and after the first orgasmic experiences well understood sign of male sexual excitement. In the opposite sex all this is not that obvious what makes clitoral erection and vaginal transudate unrecognised as signs of sexual arousal for quite a long time after their onset.
The blood inflow is not restricted to the penis, clitoris, and vagina but also many other organs become filled with blood in response to sexual stimulants. A climax enables the outflow of the blood from the penis and the clitoris within 10 to 20 seconds after orgasm, from the vagina after 15 minutes, and from the uterus up to half an hour. If there is no orgasm after a prolonged sexual arousal the outflow is much slower and in males may be a reason of transient pains in the scrotum (so called 'blue balls') and of much more serious problems in females known as chronic pelvic congestion which can cause varicose veins in the lower abdomen and evolve into pelvic congestion syndrome. In sexually active female virgins who avoid clitoral stimulation, lack of decongestion after repeated waves of sexual arousal can begin its harmful influence on the future health as early as in pre-pubertal child girls who are being exploited by their crushes during sexual encounters called dates.
Summing up: as blood congestion in organs involved in a complicated mechanism of sexual tension and arousal subsides thanks to the orgasm, the sexual gratification is not just a matter of relief from obsessive thinking about sex, but also a practical way of getting rid of "blue balls" or pre-orgasmic pelvic congestion (the other than temporary forms of pelvic congestion, especially permanent varicosities of lower abdomen unfortunately will not subside after climaxing).
Finally, whatever gives you an excitement later in the life easily recognized as sexual arousal, whatever you do for sexual gratification you may call "sex". Even if it is an involuntary activity like wet dreams. You are not responsible for what you are dreaming about, in fact lucky when your wet dream ends in an orgasm. Unfortunately there is a lot of confusion about the meaning of the word "sex". From the medical point of view, 'sexually active' is everybody who has wet dreams, masturbates, or even gets aroused chatting with his/her crush. But being asked on your annual medical examination (annual physical check ups) 'are you sexually active?' you'd rather answer 'no' if you are a virgin who is even so sexually active that you can't live without masturbation several times a day to get sufficient amount of own brain chemicals, otherwise you can end with a speculum in your vagina and torn hymen. Too many people, including medical professionals have problems with reasonable, scientific approach to the sexual issues, and instead of being questioned on your annual physical 'did you ever have sexual intercourse?' (what exactly means coitus: penis - in -vagina), and if answer is 'yes' being asked about number of lovers, venereal diseases etc. to assess all risks of promiscuity, you would be asked: 'are you sexually active?'
Now let's answer the main question: Will Sex Spoil the Hymen?
If you know well what is the hymen and where is the hymen located, and particularly what is the purpose of the hymen, you realize that defloration by your husband on the wedding night is the only licit way of breaking the seal of your virginity which by its nature the hymen is. Being offered such an exceptional privilege your future husband will be strongly obliged for and more ready for observing his marital vow. That means that you will be less at risk to suffer his cheating or being abandoned with kids, or being left behind when if crippled by a disease or just getting older.
But being a teenager or even not-yet-married woman over 20 do you think about your future so seriously? If not guided otherwise, you would rather follow the innate hedonetropism of your human nature at its lowest level of bodily pleasures.
Below, please find a rule of thumb (or any other finger).
Rubbing your clitoris is enough. Do not spoil your hymen.
For those who care about the hymen - hymen-virgin-membrane.com